46 Days Until Gown: Mein Shred

This blog is best paired with this audio clip.  For those who might be at work or in class, just hum the Imperial March from Star Wars to yourself quietly.

Okay.  So.  The course of human history is peppered with some personalities that are influential enough, crazy enough, evil enough, and just plain scary enough to make the rest of us mere mortals shake in our proverbial boots.  And for whatever reason, these people also seem to relish in publishing books.  Indeed, from Machiavelli's The Prince to Hitler's Mein Kampf, the world is littered with publications by people whose resume's should read "Employment: dictator and misery-spreader; Interests: freelance writing."

But there is one person, my friends, who has rocketed past the likes of Machiavelli and Hitler and secured her spot directly at the top of the evil pyramid: and her name is Jillian.

Oh, don't let that soft, wavy hair fool you.  Beneath that airbrushed exterior lies a merciless huntress.  An evil warrior.  And, fittingly enough, an author.

She has a book too.  Hitler would be proud.   But Jillian has a leg up (oh...don't say "leg up") on all the other crazies of pre-modern and modern time because in addition to a book of evil this woman also has videotapes.  Plural.  But one....just one is the stuff of legend.

The 30 Day Shred.

Now I haven't tried the Shred per se.  I flagrantly lied on my blog when I said that I was going to do it yesterday.  I tried to do it.  I did.  But then I got the warnings.  Oh, the warnings.  Complete strangers started telling me how terrifying the Shred is and how much my poor little body would surely ache today if I attempted the Shred.  I choked.

I am intent upon trying it today. But I am scared.  I've already broken a nail just breaking through the shiny cellophane that ensconces the Shred.  But I must do it.

I must psyche myself up for this.  I desperately need a metabolism boost.  I must start "toning."  Even the word makes my calves hurt.  Today begins...the Shred.

But in other news:

Weight: 128.4 (-0.4 since yesterday; -9.6 overall)
Calories Consumed: 1100
Exercise:  Beware the Shred.....

47 Days Until Gown: Metabolism Boost

Okay.  I have been getting comments on the blog that 1000-1100 calories is too few and it could be a reason that my weight loss has been slowing down because my body has entered "starvation mode."  These people might be on to something.

Now,  I am very hesitant about this because I don't want to mess with something that has been working for me so far, but I think I am going to increase my daily calories to 1200 and see what happens.  I started yesterday.  I actually did the math on myfitnesspal and 1200 should be fine assuming that I am "lightly" active.  I am mainly worried about the increase because my lifestyle is largely sedentary; when I don't make the time to actually work out, my day consists of sitting. A lot of sitting.

My hesitations aside, this morning's weigh-in went well.

Calories consumed: 1200. *insert nervous giggles...*
Weight: 128.6 (-0.4 since yesterday; -9.4 pounds overall). Holy cow!  Can I take a moment to bask in the lowest weight I've been (sans wine-over) since Fall 2009?  This feels good. I am a little nervous about tomorrow's weigh-in because the scale seemed to be struggling with the choice between 129 and 128.6 before finally settling.  I felt like Harry Potter in the Sorting Hat.  I had to practically "will" the thing to go down to 128.6 because it definitely wanted to place me elsewhere.

I was so nervous about the Sorting Scale's 129 proclivities, that I snapped this photo just to prove that I didn't dream it:

Additionally, in the spirit of revving up my metabolism, Fiance bought me the Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred that I am going to try out today.  I am hoping that building some muscle will burn more calories. And plus, my butt will look great.

Heh. Maybe there is something to this 1200 calories thing.  I am going to give it a week and see what happens.  Hopefully I will FINALLY reach my 127.6 benchmark next Monday and get a pedicure after the gown fitting.

In other news: some of my Pre-Chunky Bride clothes fit again! I am wearing my old jeans (my old "fat" jeans, but hey, I'll take it) and I think they look rather good!

I have also started tanning (a little bit) in preparation for the wedding.  I know. I know. I know the cancer risks and the risks of looking like a shriveled up purse later in life.  But I am getting married!  I will probably never wear a solid white gown again and I am going to look bronzed and awesome in it this one time!  It also has this way of making me look skinnier. I swear it's not my imagination.

It's not!

48 Days Until Gown: Clearing out the (Skeletons in the) Closet

Well, last night fiance and I decided to clean out our closets and get rid of things that we never wear anymore and will likely never wear again.  It was his idea. We needed more space, he argued.  I begrudgingly agreed. But what I thought was just going to be a run-of-the-mill spring cleaning marathon turned into a event of self-esteem shaking proportions.

As I opened my walk-in closet and journeyed past the items that I wear regularly these days, I came across a proverbial grave yard of cute clothes that fit me "back when..."

Some stuff was easy to toss; gauzy looking floral dresses that I bought when I was in high school.  Sure, they don't fit anymore, but even if they did there was no way I would be caught dead in them in public.  I thought for a moment about saving them for just the right "theme party" or costume down the road, but the thought was fleeting and I removed them from my closet with ease.

But then I came across some far less embarrassing and more stylish things that I couldn't even believe used to fit me. The jeans were the worst.  Size 2's, size 4's....they looked like something that a small child would wear.  I couldn't believe that they fit me just three years ago before I started law school.   I couldn't decide whether throwing away something that fit me in my early years of college was tantamount to giving up on ever getting down to that weight again.   I don't want to give up.  I want to think that I can be that girl again.  Does that mean I have to keep the clothes?

These were all thoughts that went through my head as I trudged through my closet.  

I threw them away.

I decided at that moment to be proud of what I've been doing for the last three weeks.  And to be hopeful for the next 7.  And if I ever lose enough weight to get back into things that size, I will reward myself with new stuff.  But there is nothing to gain from keeping relics from skinny-days gone by as a constant reminder in my closet.   There is no reason that someone who is 1 pound away from a 10 lb weight loss benchmark should be feeling shameful....and those clothes, well, keeping them would only overshadow what I am doing here and now.  It would do nothing but remind me of the years of bad choices that got me here and do nothing to make me feel good about trying to turn it around now.

I woke up today feeling world's lighter.   I attribute it to the great purge.

And of course, to this:

Weight: 129.0  (-9.0 since starting the blog; -0.6 since yesterday)
Calories consumed: 1100 (I am gradually going to increase a little to try to raise my metabolism)
Exercise: None. But I am enjoying a nice long workout as soon as I get off this blog.

Wish me luck!

49 Days to the Gown: Discouraging Start

Weight: 129.6
Calories Consumed:  1020
Exercise: 60 minutes; power walking 4.0 mph

Uggghhhh....the weight loss gods have it out for me. This is what I get for cheating twice last week.  I've been perfectly good ever since the latest deflection from the BBR on Thursday and I am still being punished!  129.6.  Come on!  Someone help a sister out! I gotta get down to 127.6 by next Monday's dress fitting.  That's 2 pounds.  I am a little nervous about whether it will be possible.  I have had pretty bad luck with reaching my goals this far, but if I want to stay on track to get to 120 in 7 weeks, I have got to lose at least 1.5 pounds a week.  So here goes nothing.

One thing that has made the BBR a little easier lately is that my fiance is actually on a diet for the wedding now too.  It was so hard being the only person who wasn't enjoying beers and wine and fatty foods.  Now there are two of us.  Lesson: the old adage "misery loves company" is completely true.

Oh! I found a cool new app.  I was getting really sick of not knowing how fast or how far I've been walking.  I tried manually entering my routes into Google Maps and stuff, but it just didn't quite work out because walking routes differ from driving routes--especially when I walk through the park on the way to and from school.   So I downloaded an app called Walkmeter that is basically a fancy pedometer that uses GPS signals from the iPhone to track me as I move around.   The best feature: I can enter my height and weight and it tells me how many calories I've burned from my movements.

I was also able to use Walkmeter to figure out whether the calorie "estimates" on my fitnesspal's exercise listings were accurate. The craziest thing ever: the calorie estimates on myfitnesspal were identical to the detailed calculations on Walkmeter.  Both apps had my 59:14 minute long, 4 mile walk burning 293 calories.  I was really surprised. I thought for sure that myfitnesspal would be at least a couple dozen calories off.   You learn something new every day.

Let's hope for a big loss tomorrow!

52, 51, 50 Days to the Gown: THE BIGGEST B-LOSER

Previously on, The Biggest B-Loser  ("Bride-Loser").....

After weeks of relentless adherence to the BBR, Chunky Bride stunned the competition and viewers when she cheated to avoid wearing a hideous velour tracksuit.  Her ploy worked, but soon she traversed back into the 130s after rehydrating herself.  Silly Chunky Bride.  But true to form, she eventually re-entered the 120s on her own willpower and dieting alone.  But after a few days in the 120s, she had another "fluctuation" back into the 130s leaving her feeling depressed and irritated. 

What will happen on today on The Biggest B-Loser?

Alright, alright.  I am sure everyone gets the point.  It's been a while since I've blogged.  I am truly sorry for that, but make no mistake--I have been remiss in blogging, but I've still--basically--adhered to the BBR during this time of silence.  

It has been so incredibly busy around here; I would explain why but I think this illustration by my brother and his girlfriend says it best: 

Thanks for the art, you two!  I should explain to the rest of the readers that in exchange for their art saving me a good 30 minutes of explaining what the heck has been going on over the last three days, I am to enjoy a nice long work out.  And I will be doing that the second that I get off this computer. 

Where to begin...it's been a while so I should probably start by posting a graphical chart of my weight loss to put things in perspective: 

The good news is that the progression is still decidedly downward.  The bad news is that the progress has slowed quite a bit.  If you notice, the lowest point on the chart was actually from Friday, March 25, 2010.  That morning I clocked in at 128.4 which is an all-time low. It was, however, the result of cheating.  I had four glasses of wine the night before.  Incidentally, I should mention that my tolerance for alcohol has diminished substantially since the beginning of the BBR.  

Friday and Saturday I adhered to the BBR and this morning weighed in at 129.2.  This is the same weight that I was on Wednesday morning before the fluctuation back to 130.  So this week has really not been particularly successful.  I began Monday morning at 129.6 and am ending at 129.2.  That's only a half a pound of weight loss.  If I want to lose the remaining nine and a half pounds by the wedding, I've got to post about 1.5 pounds a week (a little less actually).  The pressure is on!  

The lessons I've learned this week: diet-wise, I am not going to be able to have little glasses of wine here and there if I want to seriously lose the rest of the weight.  This was the first week of "experimenting" with enjoying calorie-laden beverages, and while I did lose some weight and I would be happy with that sort of progress if I had unlimited time, I am 50 days out from the gown.  And I am exactly one week away from my first fitting FOR the gown (April 4).  

GOAL: 1.5 pounds per week from here on out.  That means 127.6 by next week's fitting. 

The CARROT:  PEDICURE! It really is starting to stink that I haven't reached a single pedicure benchmark.  Maybe this will be the one!

The STICK:  Well, I've ordered my www.toiletwarrior.com t-shirt.  Perhaps I could use a matching trucker-hat.  Ashton Kutcher would be proud. 

That's all for today!  Thanks for everyone's support.  I apologize for the huge lag between posts this week.  I will forewarn that until April 2 there might be more lags.  I am organizing a very large event at the law school that takes place on April 1 and April 2 and it consumes a TON of time.   But I will do my damnedest! 

53 Days Until Gown: No Weigh In!

Today I was so busy that I forgot to weigh myself!  Seriously. I was driving to school at 6:00 in the morning and it dawned on me halfway there that I forgot to step on the scale after showering. I blame it on the fact that it was still pitch black outside and I was disoriented.  Well that, and I was rushed.  And tired.  And...uh...uh....

Okay fine, I admit it.  I did weigh myself and it fluctuated upwards again.  I just want to pretend that days like this don't even exist.  Today's wound is especially raw because the fluctuation put me back in the 130s.  That's like a WHOLE other ballpark than the 120s.

In any event,

Weight: 130.0 ( -8.0 overall, +0.8 since yesterday. Boo.)
Calories Consumed: 950
Exercise: None.  But my heart rate was elevated all day long from the panic.

I don't really have a whole lot to say today (or time to say it).  My thoughts lately have been pretty tied up with law school related stuff.

I promise I'll come up with something fun to say tomorrow.

54 Days Until Gown: Too Busy to Eat

I'm sorry! I know it's late. It's barely even 54 days to the gown anymore.

I never understood those people who say that they never eat because they're so busy that they "forget."

Well.  I understand now.  Today I was so busy that I did the following things:

1) Forgot to eat.
2) Literally (literally) had a "swoon" when I thought I emailed a letter with a typo to a federal judge.  (The real deal man: I almost fainted. I definitely hyperventilated.  And I cried tears of what can only be described as "shock.")  I wonder if low blood sugar from forgetting to eat had anything to do with this little "spell."
3) Talked on a cellphone whilst at a checkout counter (God, I hate that).
4) Parked illegally--knowingly--because I didn't have time to find a legitimate parking spot (luckily no ticket).
5) And perhaps worst of all: ate dinner at Wendy's.

Tomorrow I get to do it all over again.

The good news however is that I started today at the lightest weight I've seen yet: 129.2
Calories consumed: 1130
Exercise: Ha! If I had time to exercise I would cry tears of joy.

55 Days to the Gown: PERSEVERANCE

Good morning all.  Today I would like to dedicate today's blog to one concept and one concept alone: perseverance.

Perseverance is defined loosely as, "steadfastness in doing something despite the difficulty or the delay in achieving success...and the weird looks you get from people along the way."

With that as a scene-setter, I'd like to tell a story about a fictional dieting girl.  There was once a girl who had an affinity for fattening foods. Alfredo sauce, cheesy pizza, McDonalds cheeseburgers (Plain, dammit! Plain!), French cheese.....there was nothing this girl wouldn't touch.

Well one day, she decided to go on a little diet.  For the most part, her old favorite foods were completely off-limits to her---which was very sad.  She listlessly wandered around the world searching for something--anything--that despite being healthy would taste as decadent and wonderful as the foods she had given up.  Well one day, while the girl was in the midst of her pitiful search, she stumbled upon a large, imposing building that was filled with organic, non-processed, and frighteningly expensive foods (oh, and hipsters; there were also lots of hipsters).

As she stumbled through the large building her eye suddenly caught something: a delicious looking little tray filled with colorful wheels of edible glory.  And on the label, "Spicy Tuna Avocado Roll w/ Brown Rice."  Poetry.  Intrigued, she purchased the STAR (w/ Brown Rice) and tried it.  It was heaven. She had to (HAD TO!) know: just how many calories are in this little miracle?

She searched high and low.  She asked the frighteningly friendly clerks at the store where she purchased the STAR, but to no avail.  She asked the chefs who arrived to make the STAR "fresh daily."  No luck.  She employed her above-average research skills to try to find the information on the Internet.  Nada. She tried dissecting the STAR like a frog in her own kitchen to roughly estimate the calories in each ingredient herself. But no matter how precise she attempted to be, she could never quite calculate the information to a comfortable degree of certainty.

People started to think she was becoming a broken record.  Repetitive.  Relentless.  Frankly, irritating.

But just when she was about to give up, she thought, "Maybe, just maybe, if I email the manufacturer of the STAR I might find my answer."  So she did.

And five days later, Patricia Hadiwidjajaji of Kikka Sushi Incorporated responded:

And the world could finally be at peace.  Sigh. 

Calories consumed: 1070 (precisely 320 of which were from my delicious STAR!) 

Exercise: No time!

Weight: 129.6 (for REAL this time!!  -0.8 from yesterday; -8.4 overall)

56 Days: Back to Reality, Sobriety, and the 130s.

Well it was fun while it lasted, but I couldn't stay in the 120s forever....at least not until drinking some water, anyway.

Calories consumed: 1050
Exercise: 80 minutes; walking 2.5(ish) mph
Weight: 130.4 (-7.6 since the beginning, -0.4 since my last "real" weigh in, +1.0 from yesterday's "assisted" weigh in).

All in all, I am pretty pleased with today's weigh-in.   Despite having gained a pound since yesterday, I've still lost weight since my last hydrated weigh-in.  It's also really nice to know that going over my calorie limit on Saturday didn't completely ruin everything.  I had this terrifying image in my head of stepping on the scale and weighing 138.0 again after just one day going over the limit.

I also feel like I am starting to look a little thinner.  People kept commenting on my weight this weekend.  I wasn't sure if they were just stroking my ego after having read the blog or if they were serious, but it still felt good.  I'm not quite back into my Pre-Saints Superbowl clothes yet, but I am hoping that will happen soon.  I am also pretty sure that this week I will finally hit my 10 pound weight loss mark since beginning the blog!  Eeep!   If nothing else it's something to aspire towards.

The Carrot:  If I reach the 10 pound mark by Sunday, March 27 I am going to finally, finally, FINALLY  get my freakin' pedicure.  It's sandals season people!  This needs to happen.  I look like a cave person. 

The Stick:  If I do not reach the 10 pound mark by the deadline, I am going to puke and die.  Not really.  I am actually pretty pleased with myself right now so I feel kind of bad about imposing a "punishment" if I don't reach the goal.   Okay, I got it.  If I do not reach the deadline I will buy a T-shirt from www.toiletwarrior.com and wear it all week to promote the importance of fiber to any sensible diet plan. 

57 Days: I CHEATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I did.

I feel terrible.

Calories Consumed: 1511 (+411 over my predetermined calorie limit. And to make matters worse, 650 of them were from drinking a bottle of red wine.)

Exercise: None. Unless, of course, you count the exercise my liver did to process all that wine last night. But somehow I don't think that is aerobically effective.

*shame*

But, my friends, sometimes cheating has it's perks...

Weight: 129.4 (-1.4 since yesterday; -8.6 overall)

Of course I realize that this is not a "real" weigh-in because the minute I get rehydrated my weight's going to go back up.  But that didn't stop me from taking a photo to bask in the 120s even if it is just temporary.

It's just so pretty.  I want to stare at it until I fall asleep...

But I know that it's not real.   And I know that tomorrow the number will go back up and I will feel terrible about it. But it's still fun to look at.

But this does bring up an ethical dilemma.  In case you're new to the blog, today is a high-stakes day in the ChunkyBride world.  I made myself a deal: if I reached the 120s by today I would get a pedicure, but if I did not, I would wear a purple velour tracksuit with matching sequined tank top as a mark of shame. Shame!

Now, there was nothing in the deal that expressly said the weigh-in had to be unassisted by the dehydration that follows from drinking a bottle of wine.  But it would sort of be implied wouldn't it?  I mean, if I get myself a pedicure because I reached my goal after cheating that would set a bad example for the little children of the world....

But if I wear the tracksuit I might scare the little children of the world...

What to do!?

Okay.  I will split the baby: I will not get myself a pedicure because it just feels wrong to get a treat after bilking the system. BUT I will also not wear the tracksuit because, quite simply, I reached the 120s by today. Right or wrong.

And the lesson for the little children of the world: get better role models than me.

Not looking forward to tomorrow's weigh-in....

58 Days: Now That's More Like It

Calories Consumed: 1000
Exercise: very little; 15 minutes of brisk walking
Weight: 130.8 ( -1.4 since yesterday...but really -0.4 from TUESDAY grrrr; -7.2 overall )

PROOF: (sorry about the poor photo quality)

Well that's a nice change since yesterday!  Unfortunately, I don't think it's enough to put me in the 120s by tomorrow's deadline.  I've never posted two one-pound losses in a row, so I am pretty sure that today will be dedicated to tracking down the remaining portion of the damn tracksuit.

And it's official: I will no longer eat Quiznos sandwiches before days that are crucial for weigh-ins.  I mean, it's just water weight so it's fine from time to time, but, for instance, tomorrow when there are pedicures and crimes against fashion at stake, I'll skip it.

Putting aside the fact that I doubt I'll reach 129.8 by tomorrow, I would like to mention that this is the lightest that I have been in a really long time. I got down to 131.5(ish) for a couple days right before and after St. John last summer, but this is definitely the first time I've seen 130 since pre-Saints Superbowl...and probably a little while before that too.  So that's exciting!

I also reached another milestone in the BBR journey: I drank a beer!  Yes! An entire ice cold 16 oz Budlight was all mine yesterday. And I didn't gain all 7 pounds back in one night!

Happy weekend everyone!

59 Days: Assemble the Ensemble

It's 10:44 pm.  I usually don't post this late, but it's still technically March 18, 2011 so I haven't missed a day! Sorry for the delay though. Today was completely nuts with law school.  I barely even had time to think about the BBR.

But how's the diet going?  I'll give you a hint:

Yup.   That's 2/3 of my infamous velour tracksuit with matching sequined tank top (still can't find the track pants).  I made a point to dig it out of the back of the closet after this morning's doozy of a weigh in:

Calories: 1020
Exercise: 45 minutes walking 3.0 mph
Weight: 132.2  (-5.8 overall. I don't even want to calculate the difference between yesterday and today....)

Okay.  You'd think by now I would be completely used to the whole "Hey, it's a diet. You'll fluctuate sometimes" thing. You'd think.

But no.  It still sucks. Every. Single. Time.

I didn't let it discourage me though! I stuck by my guns today and I even discovered (with help from a couple friends) what could be the culprit from the vast majority of my "fluctuations."  A friend commented on the blog warning me about the sodium content in the Michelina's meals from the Tribute to Deliciousness.  I originally disregarded that comment because I've actually been really good about keeping track of the sodium in most things, because I am trying to lower my blood pressure.  But her comment really inspired me because later today it hit me: each time I've gained weight during the diet it was a morning after eating at Quiznos.  So I checked myfitnesspal and it turns out that the Quiznos nutritional information that I've been using does not include sodium so it wasn't getting factored into my daily totals. And it would completely make sense if my go-to sandwich at Quiznos is a sodium bomb because it tastes way too good to be both low calorie and low in sodium.

So I am hoping that tomorrow morning I'll post a nice loss and that the gain today was just holding water after eating a super-salty Quiznos sandwich.  We'll see.  And if that proves to be the case I owe some friends a thank-you!

Also, I wanted to address a question in the comments section about what I've been drinking since the BBR.

I would say I drink about 30(ish) ounces of sparkling water a day.  I like the 32 oz. generic brand at Whole Foods.  I also drink a lot of Diet Mountain Dew and Diet Pepsi (for whatever reason I feel like it's more "special" than run-of-the-mill Diet Coke).

I probably shouldn't drink that much diet soda but I justify it two ways. First, the only real problem I've ever heard about diet soda that makes any sense at all is that it tends to keep people craving carbohydrates--particularly simple sugars--because the fake sweeteners don't actually fill the body's need for sugar when someone craves something sweet.  This problem really doesn't apply to me (in my layman opinion).  I've never really liked sweets. Ever.  And I have yet to crave a carb on the BBR.  I tend to yearn for cheese, cream, and other fatty things....so I don't see my drinking diet soda as putting myself at risk of some crazy, carb-tastic binge. Second, I am depriving myself of so many things lately I feel like I am entitled to one vice, damnit! So the diet soda stays.

Anyway that's all for now.

Think thin!  I really don't have enough time to hunt down the remaining third of that tracksuit.

60 Days: A Tribute to Deliciousness

Oh for crying out loud....everything I said yesterday about "finding my peace" was total crap.

Calories consumed: 988
Exercise: 90 minutes; walking 3.5 mph on average (that's really brisk!)
Weight: 131.8 again (same as yesterday, -6.2 overall)

60 days left!  Gosh that's soon. And with time ticking away, my body appears to want to cling to 131.8 as if its life depended on it.  It's been 4 days, people! 4 days and no downward movement.  With only 8 weeks to go until the wedding I am going to have to ramp it up if I want to be lithe and svelte in time for the deadline.  And it is imperative that I reach my goal of 120 by the deadline because otherwise my father does not have to reimburse me for Lucy and Ricky as per this bet. AND it's even more imperative that I reach 129.8 by Sunday because my skinny clothes still don't fit and I really don't want to wear the velour tracksuit.

I think that to have a chance in hell at succeeding at this diet, the trick is to find stuff that I can eat that I truly love and enjoy having.  If I have to turn to disgusting "diet foods" every time my friends or family get to enjoy something that is off-limits, it only breeds resentment for the diet. But I can't resent my diet...I must love my diet (otherwise, I won't want to stand by it).

So with no further adieu I'd like to present my Tribute to Deliciousness

1. Spicy Tuna Avocado Roll with Brown Rice (duh) 

What a power player.  This roll has it all: whole grains in the brown rice, lean protein, "the good fats" in the avocado, and, of course, a touch of decadent spicy mayo.  According to my laboratory-frog project that I referenced earlier, the entire roll contains about 400 calories. That's generally a little higher than I care to go in one meal--I like to leave plenty of room for snacks--but it's so tasty that it makes me feel like I'm having a real treat. So bring it on.

2) Michelina's.  ANYTHING by Michelina's. 

I owe this to one of my best friends and bridesmaids who turned me onto Michelina Lean Gourmet.  When it comes to convenient, pre-portioned meals say goodbye to Smart Ones, Lean Cuisines, Healthy Choice Meals, and the rest of them: Michelina's is the only way to go.  At about a dollar a box they are easily the cheapest thing in the Tribute to Deliciousness.  They also manage to accomplish what none of the other, more expensive "convenience meal" manufacturers manage to do: include chicken that doesn't inevitably have weird, grizzly bits mixed in.   Michelina's has a Lean Gourmet line that is lower calorie and fat than the regular stuff, but even the regular ones still usually average around 320 calories each.  Yum. 

3. Artichokes

You can't really top a 60 calorie snack that easily takes 30 minutes to eat.  Each of these little guys is low calorie and packed with fiber (which is great for keeping things "moving along" so to speak).  I like to top mine with 10 calorie Maple Grove Farms Fat Free Caesar.  

4. Pictsweet Edamame Steamables 

God I love edamame.  Add a little sea salt and what a tasty and filling snack. I actually make a full meal out of this stuff.  It has a ton of fiber and protein. The entire bag (which is a crap-load of edamame) clocks in at about 275 calories (I know this because I emailed Pictsweet's customer service people because the label can be a bit confusing). 

5. Cheez-Its. 

Okay, okay. Cheez Its aren't particularly interesting (or even particularly healthy) in their own right.  But as I mentioned in the first blog ever, I have this "thing" for cheese.  I can't get enough. Unfortunately cheese is not particularly filling and can be incredibly fattening so I like to munch on Cheez Its when I crave something cheesy because it is the lesser of two evils. 

Anyway. Those are the foods that are getting me through the storm right now.  Feel free to comment below with anything healthy and deliciously awesome that you recommend. 

61 Days: Gaining Perspective

Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise: None. No time. Law school is consuming my life.
Weight: 131.8 (-6.2 overall, +0.4 since yesterday)

I am not going to panic.  I have found my peace.  Sometimes the scale will fluctuate upwards, but so long as I stick to the diet it always--and I mean always--eventually goes back down (and then some!).

I cannot say enough good things about the myfitnesspal app.  I downloaded it for my iPhone back at the very beginning of this journey and I have entered my weight every single day.  One of its greatest features that I am just now beginning to appreciate is the graphical chart of my weigh-ins that it keeps for me.

*

*I'd like to mention that I began tracking my weight on the myfitnesspal app about two weeks before beginning the blog and the BBR.  You may notice that the relevant starting point for the blog begins right at the apex of the chart around 02/28.

Now, at first, when I had only tracked about a week of weigh-ins, even the smallest fluctuation looked huge on the graph. But as more time has gone by and more weigh-ins have been logged, the little gains that I fretted over so much just look like tiny blips on the graph.  The overall pattern is clear: I'm succeeding!

So yes. Today was a bit of a setback, but I am sure that in a few days it will be nothing more than a tiny blip on the chart.

It does, however, present a bit of a problem for my goal of getting into the 120s by Sunday.  A "blip" on Sunday would suck because, yet again, I will not get my pedicure...and I really, really don't want to wear the tracksuit.  So let's hope for big losses the rest of this week and no little "blips" on the days when it counts.

62 Days: My Shit Doesn't Fit!

NOTE:  This blog entry was originally written yesterday, Tuesday, March 15, 2011.  For whatever reason blogspot's server was down so I couldn't post it.

Calories Consumed: 1000 (including 1 glass of the bubbly to celebrate booking our honeymoon flights)
Exercise: Not a bit.
Weight: 131.2 (I'm shocked! And thrilled! -0.6 from yesterday; -6.8 overall)

Alright, today's excellent weigh-in aside, we've got a problem. Well, I've got a problem.  Specifically none of my clothes fit!  My Pre-BBR clothes are all hopelessly too big, but my Pre-ChunkyBride clothes are all still a hair  too small.  I've been wondering all morning how that could possibly be.  What the heck was I wearing en route to 138.0?  I must have been wearing something.


And then it hit me like a ton of bricks: Velour. Tracksuit.

Yes, friends. Sadly, that's me in the above photo.  (The cheesy-poofs aren't mine. Honest). That little number that I am sporting in the photo oversaw my journey through the 130s.  I bought it when I was about 129 pounds and wore it during the 2 months of weight gain that accompanied the Saint's epic 2009 season.  When the season ended--and I had gained weight considerably--I decided that I had to own some actual clothes (ya know, clothes that are made of some type of "cloth") and bought the stuff that I am swimming in now.

So anyway, you can see the dilemma.  I can either wear the stuff from Pre-BBR and look like a bag lady, or I can wear the too-tight stuff from my Pre-ChunkyBride Days (and presumably lose even more weight according to this article). But there is one thing that is NOT an option: wearing the velour tracksuit.

In other news, I've set a new goal for myself:  I'd like to reach the 120s by this weekend.  Goal: 129.8 or lower.  Deadline: Sunday morning.  That gives me three days to lose a little over a pound.  I think it's doable...but it's also a close call whether or not it is doable so that will keep it fun.

The Carrot:  If I reach my goal I will finally get my pedicure--the very same little bit of personal pampering that has been eluding me for weeks now.

The Stick: If I do not reach the goal, I will hunt down and wear the velour tracksuit as a mark of shame.

Wish me luck! I am gonna need it!

63 Days Until Gown: Whole Foods Sushi....Meet Your Match

Okay, so for anyone who's just now following the blog, I have a bit of a "thing" against Whole Foods.  Specifically, I find them a hypocritical company that won't man-up and distribute the nutritional information for their prepared foods (my real vendetta against them stems from the fact that they do not post the information about their sushi).

Disagree with me all you want.  I admit that they've sort of got a "feel good" thing going on, what with their "free samples" and "friendly clerks" and "food that does not contain healthy, nutritious mercury" and stuff. But when you see some of the shysty places that do post their nutritional information, it really casts Whole Foods in a bad light.

The latest place that I have discovered that actually does provide their sushi's calorie information is my not-so-friendly neighborhood Breaux Mart (for the Yankees who read this, it's pronounced "Bro" as in: "My younger Bro decided to open a Mart. I'm gonna check it out. Anyone need some Copenhagen?").  I was more than just a little surprised to discover that the Breaux Mart sushi is 100% calorie-transparent.  I mean this is the same place that just last year wreaked of moth balls and that sells cotton candy in the checkout aisles.  If this place can pony up the sushi stats, then I think Whole Foods should be able to.

Now, some of you (the more rational ones of you) might be thinking, "Just stop going to Whole Foods and get your sushi from the "Bro" Mart and quit whining and leave us alone..."  And I would ordinarily be inclined to agree.  But the only problem is that I am pretty sure that Breaux Mart is the filthiest little store ever. Just ever.  I once bought lunch meat there that had expired two weeks prior (I mean, yeah, I could have checked....but should you really have to? I mean come on...).  And that was COOKED.  So I am not sure I am ready to take the leap and start eating raw fish from there.

Why am I bitching about this?  Well, I woke up today light as a freakin' feather and I have no other complaints.  So....yeah.

Today: lots and lots of school stuff....and yes, a trip to Whole Foods. Because I don't want formaldehyde in my food. Damn them!

Stats:
Weight 131.8  (-1.2 since yesterday; -6.2 overall). 
Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise:  *shame* Not a bit.

Day 64: Belated Victory

VICTORY IS MINE!!!

As the photo makes plainly clear, someone lost more than just an hour last night!  I lost an entire pound between yesterday and today and have finally reached the 5 pound weight loss mark since starting the blog!  It's a tad bittersweet that I didn't reach this point yesterday...it's a bit like picking the winning lottery numbers a day too early or something. But I am still really happy.

The Obligatory Stats:
Calories Consumed: 1000. More impressively though, I had like 26 grams of fiber yesterday.
Exercise: None....unless sidestepping beads and cabbages thrown from the St. Patty's Day Parade counts.
Weight: 133.0 (-1.0 since yesterday; -5.0 OVERALL) Five pounds!  It doesn't sound like a ton, but that's the weight of a standard bag of flour.

I can't believe that I've lost the equivalent a bag of flour from my body in just about 2 weeks!  I believe that I am right on track to lose the entire 18 pounds by the wedding.

I am actually beyond relieved that I reached the 5 pound mark today because yesterday...well, yesterday was hard.  First, it was incredibly difficult to summon the willpower to stick to the diet after having a second setback in the same week.  It's hard for me to cope with that sort of backtracking when I know that I haven't cheated even once since beginning the diet.  It becomes incredibly difficult to not slip into the "Well, I did everything right and I gained weight, so why not eat this cheeseburger/pizza/side of beef" mindset after a gain.

Yesterday was also the St. Patrick's Day Parade.  I was surrounded by a whole lot of self-proclaimed Irish people who were making it their business to get really, really drunk.  Then my adorable fiance' arrived at the parade with a ton of Jell-O shots that I really wanted to enjoy with everyone else.  But I held fast.  It was really hard though.  One friend suggested just putting some vodka in my Diet Mountain Dew.  "It's only 50 calories an ounce."

Tempting.  Very tempting.

But in the end, I just couldn't do it.  I attribute my willpower to this blog...and more specifically its readers.  You and this blog have become the most powerful tool I have against temptation.  I can't cheat because then I'd have to admit it here.  When I'm successful, it feels great to share it with the world.  When I cheat--if I cheat--I'd have to own up to 100-hits-a-day's worth of shame.

So, thanks. I literally couldn't do this without you.

65 Days: Cling Ons

Remember Tom Cruise back before he went completely crazy and married Katie Holmes?  Yeah, I do too. I miss the Top Gun and Jerry Maguire days.  But about 6 years ago Tom Cruise went off the deep-end, became a Scientologist (whatever that is), hopped up and down on Oprah's couch, and married a knocked-up Katie Holmes.  Or maybe she got knocked up after they got married....  It doesn't matter.   The point of this story is that they had a daughter named Suri who captivated US Weekly readers everywhere with her adorable brown hair and designer outfits.

Well, Suri, almost 5, has been largely out of the news lately. Except just last week I saw an article about her and her pacifier that she apparently still uses with regularity.

^^^^Proof^^^^

Now I'm no expert, but it appears to some commentators that 5 is a bit too old to still use an item that is really intended for the under-2 crowd. (But honestly, I am pretty sure that I was still using a pacifier when I was 11, so I am not judging). 

By now you might be wondering why a blog that heretofore has been dedicated to my weight loss journey is harping on Suri Cruise and her weird little obsession with her binky.  Well, friends, I am trying to set up an elaborate metaphor.

Today I am Suri Cruise's pacifier.  And playing the role of Suri Cruise:

*drumroll please*

MOTHER F***ING 134.0. 

Why, oh why, OH WHY can't the 134s let me go?  Seriously! I haven't checked, but I think that over 1/3 of the blog has been dedicated to getting out of the goddamned 134s.  I've never experienced such a clingy relationship with a number on the scale before. 

There are literally Cling-Ons on my Starboard Boughs. 

I am not sure what happened.  Just for the record here are the stats:

Calories consumed: 900 (I thought that would be fool-proof the day before the weigh-in...and the last 100 of those were a handful of prunes before bed. So again, no idea how this happened). 

Exercise: 50 minutes walking 3.5 mph 

Weight: 134.0 +0.6 from yesterday, -4.0 lbs overall

I am not going to wonder how or why this happened. Actually, that's not true. Evidently, this entire thing could have been avoided if I had just eaten with my left hand and imagined myself thin yesterday.  I also should have put the Quiznos sandwich that I ate on a smaller plate. That would have done it. 

Anyway, what's on the menu today? Well, I am still getting my hair done which should be a lot of fun. 

I am also using today to figure out once and for all how many calories are in my favorite sushi roll from Whole Foods.  I intend to purchase 2 rolls.  1 that I will eat and enjoy.  And 1 that I will dissect like a laboratory frog to weigh each of its components using my handy-dandy food scale. 

But today the closest that I am getting to a pedicure is this:

66 Days: This is Turning Into A Real Nail-Biter

No pun intended.

Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise: 45 minutes (walking 3.5 mph; intermittent jogging....well, really just 1 all-out sprint when my route took me under  I-10 by the homeless shelter and halfway house).
Weight: 133.4 (-0.6 lbs since yesterday -4.6 overall)

The producers of a reality TV show couldn't have edited the footage of my weight loss journey to make it more of a nail-biter than it has become.  For anyone who is just now joining us, I decided at the outset of this blog that I was hoping to lose 5 pounds by tomorrow because I have a hair trial for the wedding and I was going to reward myself for reaching the 5 lb mark by getting a very badly needed pedicure (see photos from Day 74 for proof).

At the time when I made this little deal with myself, I expected to coast into 5 pound territory far earlier than tomorrow.  But then there was the stagnation of doom and the day of scale trickery and/or water retention.  And now here we are.  A mere 1 day away from my arbitrary and self-imposed deadline and 0.4 pounds to go.  So like I said, reality TV couldn't have fake-timed this better.

Anyway, enough about that.  Yesterday one of my friends who has been following the blog sent me a link to one of our local news stations.  They were running an article about weird ways to lose weight.  That sounded like something that would be right up my alley, so I clicked the link.  Now, I do not claim to be any kind of a diet or fitness expert. We're all learning together here.  But my friends, if I know one thing about weight loss, I know this: the suggestions in this article are absolute crap.   Let's explore them!

1) Use your non-dominant hand while eating. Rationale: You will eat slower and concentrate on the fork.  I believe that this entry was accidentally moved from the "How to Ruin All Your Clothes" article.

2) Put your fork down after every bite and chew 30 times. Rationale: You will eat slower and your body will feel fuller. I strongly believe in savoring food and stuff....but 30 bites? What the heck does this article think you're eating? A leather strap?!

3) Make your food uneatable! (ie., dumping salt, sugar, pepper, etc. on food so that you can't pick at your plate after you've finished) This one is actually quite effective.  So much so, that it is popular with teenage girls with eating disorders the world over.  Try this instead: ask your waiter for a to-go box and put half of your meal in it right away.  It's far less offensive to the starving children in China.

4) Brush your teeth when you feel the need to snack. Rationale: your body will "think" that it's time for bed and that there is no more eating for the day.  I can do you one better: when you need a snack, eat toothpaste. Then call poison control.  They'll pump your stomach, and that translates to real weight loss.

5) Place your used napkin on top of your plate.  Okay, I can't really argue with this one.  At least they're not suggesting we dump salt and pepper everywhere.

6) Place a picture of yourself at your heaviest on the refrigerator door. Rationale: Pure shame. (Though they don't say it in so many words). As someone who has a dumpy frumpy photo on my fridge I can attest: by the time your hand is on the fridge door it's too late for petty shame.  Try putting a dozen or so rabid bats in the fridge.  That works every time.

7) Wear tight clothes. Rationale: You can't/won't eat if you know that you're one after-dinner mint away from popping your top button. While you're at it, there's a huge sale going on at the Baby Gap! I swear, between this suggestion and the eating with your non-dominant hand thing, they really could have started a new list called "Ways to Make Fat People Look Ridiculous." Seriously, unless you want your professional and social life to suffer, wear clothes that fit.

8) Imagine yourself thin. I don't even care what rationale they give for this, that is NOT a way to lose weight...unless you're a Jedi. Believe me.

9) Use small plates.  How about: use small portions.  There. Much better.

10) Drink water before you eat a meal. Okay. that one is actually good. At least they ended on a high note!

Happy Friday y'all!

67 Days Until Gown: The Final Countdown (to pedicure)

For Optimum Entertainment Value the Author Recommends Reading this Blog Whilst Listening to this Clip:

OR this one (same song, different style; just a matter of personal preference):

Calories Consumed: 1040

Exercise: 60 minutes; walking 2.5 mph

Weight: 134.0 (-4.0 lbs overall.  Not sure what the change is since yesterday's wackadoodle weigh-in). 

Pounds To Go Until PEDICURE: 1.0 

Well, folks. I did it. I cracked the pesky 134.4 mark that's had me wallowing in self doubt for the last THREE days.  Good god it feels good to break free from that nonsense. 

But now there is a one-pound fish to fry and it's name is 134.0.  That's right. I am a mere pound away from getting a much needed pedicure. The next two days of my life will be devoted exclusively to chewing up 134.0 and spitting it back out.  Ordinarily I would say that's no problem, but after my little detour down Route 134.4, I am not certain that I can do it.  One thing I do know: I have to ramp it up today and tomorrow. 

In other news, the last couple days have been pretty good.  I reached a major milestone in my "lifestyle change" yesterday: I ate lunch at a restaurant!  It was scary. I am not going to lie.  It's always frightening to not know precisely what is going into your food.  Oh sure, the grilled chicken and veggies sounds innocuous enough, but when it comes out dripping in buttery goodness, the jig is up. 

I came prepared: I brought my food scale, a liquid measuring cup and other measuring apparatuses so that I could figure out ounces of whatever I ended up ordering whether it be fish or chicken or butter. I ultimately ended up going the safest route possible and ordered a soup for which a "Brand Name" was provided (so that I could look up the stats on the Internet).  Of course, I still had to measure the fluid ounces of soup using my nifty tools to get an accurate calorie count.  This required taking the empty soup bowl and my liquid measuring cup to the bathroom for some jolly good water-measuring fun. The waitress didn't seem to care for me when I did this, but sometimes ridicule, mockery, and outright loathing is the price you pay for being calorie-conscious. 

Now, of course, were the restaurant required to post it's calorie information or something none of that would have been necessary, but I digress...

I've also noticed a spectacular improvement in my blood pressure.  It was some crazy-high number like 178/110 around Thanksgiving.  According to the blood pressure cuff at the Winn-Dixie it's down to 125/75.  Still not a perfect 120/80, but I'll take it. 

All in all, a slightly slow week for the BBR, but progress is progress.  After reaching my 5 lb goal, I will need to come up with a new treat for when I reach the 10 pound mark.  Perhaps a glass of wine! Or a paintball gun or something.  But for now I must tackle 134.0.....

68 Days: Losing Control

Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise: Not much; light walking up and down parade route
Weight:  sigh....


I am really unsure what happened. I have no explanation. I wish I did.

Weight: 135.2 (-2.8 overall; + 0.8 since yesterday/the day before)

Really? A gain? Almost an entire pound gain?  I didn't even have a text color picked out for gains because I didn't think it was humanly possibly to gain weight while on a diet (assuming that I don't cheat; which I haven't).  Looking back on it, I would have done losses in green and gains in red because the purple just looks terrible.  In a way I guess it's fitting though; it's like a big purple bruise on my confidence.

Well this sucks.  I've spent all morning wondering what could have caused the change.  Water retention?  I mean, I guess that could explain it although I've never really been the type to fluctuate based on water retention.  Was the 134.4 a fluke in and of itself?  It seems unlikely to have the same fluke two days in a row...

In any event, and regardless of what's going, on I feel like total shit today.  It's so aggravating.  If I thought I was going to wake up a pound heavier I would have indulged in mimosas and pizza and beer like the rest of the world yesterday.  In a way I wish I had, because at least then I could say, "Well, I cheated. Better luck next time."  But at this point my faith in the ability to take the weight off in time for the wedding has been shaken to the core.  What happens if I keep doing everything right and the weight just never goes away?

I realize that this is being a little histrionic, but I'm being honest in saying that nothing feels worse than the idea that this weight loss thing might not even be within my control.  Is every weigh-in going to be a crap shoot? Will I get accustomed to doing the work and nonetheless seeing gains on the scale and having absolutely no explanation for it?

Nothing (in the dieting world, anyway) feels worse than this feeling of powerlessness.

EDIT: Tried the scale again. It says 134.4 now. Whether or not that's true ???  I am not sure what to make of this.  I can't determine if this whole thing has just been scale-trickery or what.  But here's a photo for my own peace of mind:

And I take back all that stuff I said about Whole Foods.  I'll take stagnation any day over a gain. 

69 Days Left: Pro Choice

Alright, let me start off today's blog by saying that I am stunned and confused, and I have been consulting the laws of thermodynamics for the last few hours and there is still no explanation for what is about to follow:

Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise: 75 minutes (walking 3.0 mph; sporadic, intermittent jogging)
Weight: 134.4  !?!?!?!?!???!??!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?

WTF, man?! That makes no sense at all.   How can there be a 0.0 lb change since yesterday?  I am not cheating! I'm doin' the work; I'm not a slacker!  So what gives?!

Naturally, I am going to place the blame for this on someone and I've decided to blame Whole Foods.  And the Louisiana Legislature.  And the United States Congress.

Why, you ask?  Well, I walked to Whole Foods yesterday to enjoy my absolute favorite sushi roll.  When I arrived at Whole Foods I realized that the calorie information on the roll was nowhere to be seen.  So I went to guest services and asked them.  And they sent me to the sushi-roller people to ask them.  And they told me they didn't have the information with them, but could bring it the rest of the week (and I will be going back to check on Wednesday when the Mardi Gras is over).  But, really? Whole Foods?  COME ON! I thought you were supposed to be on team "let's all be healthy." Wouldn't it be nice if you provided nutritional information for all of your prepared foods?  I mean, I can understand Aldi's being aloof about their calorie information; that just comes with a territory. But you're WHOLE FOODS!   I say, put your money where your mouth is and put up nutritional information for all of your products.  I am talking on the website AND in the store.

But of course, blaming Whole Foods alone would just be silly.  That's right: I'm looking at you Louisiana Legislature (hereinafter, "LL").  Seriously, LL?  Louisiana consistently ranks among the worst states in the United States in terms of obesity and diabetes and all other measures of poor health.  Now, I would never suggest you put a tax on soda or put a moratorium on building new fast food outlets or anything. That would deny people their personal choice.  And choice is good.  But why not at least give people who want to CHOOSE to be healthy the ability to make an INFORMED CHOICE?  California and New York City have already implemented measures that require certain restaurants (those that have a certain number of locations, etc.) to post their calorie information in big prominent letters on the menu.  I used to think that might be a little weird until I went to St. Louis and the Bread Company (Panera, elsewhere) had posted the calories on their menu.  It was absolutely amazing being able to order and know what I was getting.  So, LL, I implore you: do something that is pro choice.  Just this once.

But, being a realist, I know that Louisiana won't legislate on anything (unless, of course, it's declaring March 2, 2011 Official Chitlin Day or something).  So I put this to the United States Congress.  No one whines more about the state of obesity in America (particularly among America's children) than the federal government.  So DO something about it Congress!  Don't pass ridiculous taxes to try to influence choice; that would simply burden the lower and middle class and would likely not lead to any real changes.  But give people the ability to make informed choices in what they eat!  And don't even try to say that public health is a matter usually left to the states; this is an obvious Commerce Clause issue.  Just adopt something similar to New York City's ordinance that requires all chain restaurants (and grocery stores' prepared foods departments *cough* Whole Foods *cough*) to publish their nutritional information where people can see it!   I am all about limiting government interference in our lives.  But when a frantic New Orleanian bride can't enjoy a f***ing sushi roll without facing stagnant weight loss the next day something is very wrong with the United States of America!

But really Whole Foods.

70 Days Left: Other Measures of Health

Weight: 134.4 (-0.6 lb change from yesterday; -3.6 lbs lost since beginning the blog).
Calories Consumed: 1000
Exercise: Not Much.

Well yesterday was absolutely nuts in the Chunky Bride neighborhood.  Due to the nasty weather two days ago, one of Mardi Gras' biggest parades was rescheduled to roll in my neighborhood after another one of Mardi Gras' biggest parades that was already scheduled to roll in my neighborhood.  The result: an absolute clusterfuck around my house.

I've never seen such dense and crazy crowds.  Ever.  At Mardi Gras or at any other event for that matter.  How did the crowds affect my fitness goals?  Well, negatively.  It's very difficult to power-walk/jog when there are quite literally no sidewalks or streets that aren't completely clogged with passersby/campers-out.  I gave it a noble effort and then just settled on walking a leisurely pace to find friends along the route. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right?  Right.

So my C25K goals are several days behind which is sort of irritating. But nonetheless, my weight loss goals are still on the right on track.  (Only 1.4 pounds away from PEDICURE!!) I have five days until the hair trial and I am really hoping I can lose enough weight to get my pedicure.  It will be nice to have a pretty princess day.  And in addition to my hair trial, I have another reason for wanting a pedicure:

(drumroll, please)

I ordered my wedding shoes! They should be delivered from Zappos by the end of the week and I just can't bear to stick my creepy, unpolished toes into them.  So that's more motivation right there. 

Today I am going to take advantage of the lull in the Mardi Gras action to go C25K-ing to Whole Foods and enjoy my favorite sushi roll: Spicy Tuna and Avocado. And I think after that I am going to walk to the Winn-Dixie on Tchopitoulas to check my blood pressure.  I don't remember the exact numbers, but it was frighteningly high around Thanksgiving. I'd like to see if the walking and dieting has improved it at all.  I think that while weight is important, I'd also like to check out some other measures of good health to make sure that I am on the right track.  

And speaking of measures of health, my BMI has begun shifting since the dieting began:

Notice, that at the beginning of the BBR, my BMI indicates that I was overweight.  I've now danced safely back into healthy weight category.  That's feels good too. 

That's all for now! 

71 Days Left: HOLY COW (and shrimp).

I couldn't wait to get to the computer to post this little update:

Weight: 135.0 (-1.0) lbs from yesterday!  -3.0 pounds total (according to a professor at the University of Missouri, if it was cocaine we were talking about, that's a street value of like 50,000 dollars.  And for the rest of us, that's like 12 quarter pounders at McDonald's...HOLY COW!).

This is the first time I've seen an entire pound of weight loss overnight.  I double and triple checked the scale; it's official.  I actually had a feeling that today might be a big drop because yesterday's .04 lb difference was a bit less than usual.  I was very pleasantly surprised that my hunch turned out be correct.

Reasons why 135.0 feels awesome:
1) It's a nice round number; anything above 135.0 feels like it should be rounded to 140, which just sucks.
2) It's the first time I've been this weight since just before Christmas.
3) It means I am only 2 pounds away from getting a pedicure next Saturday (and I need a pedicure, so I will do whatever it takes to make that happen).

I didn't do a whole lot yesterday. The weather was awful.  I curled up with some DVD's and just enjoyed having a day off.  I did, however, discover a new guilt-free recipe that I think is decadent enough that it is worth sharing to the calorie conscious and non-dieters alike.  It's also easy enough that I can do it (which means that you, your 7 year old, or your Golden Retriever could also probably do it).

No-Guilt Holy Sauteed Cajun Shrimp and Cheddar Cheese Grits
Ingredients:

For the sauteed shrimp: 
3 oz. peeled and deveined shrimp
1/2 tbsp butter
1/4 tsp (ish) minced garlic
black pepper to taste
Tony Chachere's to taste

For the cheddar cheese grits:
1/4 cup Quaker Quick Grits
3/4 cup water (or as directed on the grits package)
generous dash Lea and Perrin's Worcestershire Sauce
1 oz. Cabot 75% reduced fat white cheddar cheese
cayenne pepper to taste
salt to taste
black pepper to taste

Prepare the grits as directed on the grits package.
While the grits are cooking, heat butter in a skillet on high heat (I like to toss the shrimp in on high heat before reducing because it creates this fantastic crispiness on the outside that is to die for).
Add shrimp, garlic, black pepper and Tony's
Reduce heat to medium/medium high.
Saute until cooked through. (depending on the size of the shrimp this step usually ends just as the Quick Grits are finished cooking).
Set aside.

When the grits have thickened, add the cheese, worcestershire sauce, cayenne, salt, and pepper.
Top with the shrimp. (Oh, and make sure to get the buttery-garlicky renderings from the pan into the grits too.  These calories are already accounted for in the recipe and it really is a nice touch).
Enjoy.

Recipe yields 1 serving. This entire decadent recipe clocks in at 325 calories and just under 7 grams of fat.  (In the sodium department it might cost you, however). It is incredibly filling.  I haven't tried it yet, but adding a bit of Worcestershire Sauce to the shrimp as they cook might be a nice touch too.

BONUS: Being holy shrimp (and being meat-free) this is a great recipe for Fridays in Lent (although it tastes completely sinful).

Anyway, today is going to be a parade-filled, hot-bed of moral turpentine.  I'll be enjoying every minute of it just after I finish my C25K workout (the weather is FINALLY good enough to go walking/jogging).

72 Days Until Gown: 2 steps forward...1 step back

Well Mardi Gras is officially in full swing in New Orleans despite the lousy weather. Yesterday was absolutely gross, which put a real damper (heh) on my plans to go running.  My right forearm, however, got quite a workout because I used the nasty day to hand address every single wedding invitation.  Ouch.

With no further adieu, here are my current stats:

Weight: 136.0 (-0.4 lb loss from yesterday; -2.0 lbs lost overall).
Calories consumed: 1000
Exercise: 25 minutes (25 minutes walking 2.0 mph from my house to our spot on the parade route...I realize this barely counts).

2 Pounds though!  When I saw the scale this morning I got all excited, but then I realized that 2 pounds is not a particularly large amount of weight.  But chew on this:

I've lost the equivalent of EIGHT sticks of butter in three days!  That's so gross when you think about it, but it's true!  So yay!  I would consider that a small victory. 


I also ventured into a smoke-filled, crowded, loud, crazy bar for the first time since the boozefree diet began.  And that actually wasn't bad at all. I enjoyed sparkling water and lime; it was no San Pellegrino, but it did the job.   I just wish that the Rendezvous hadn't been so full (a party bus dropped off like 120 people at the exact same time; it was very hard to move around). Had it been just the usual crowd, it would have been an absolute blast.  So nights on the town are on the menu!  That's what I call the beginnings of a lifestyle change that has staying power. Another victory.

But along with the victories, come the fallbacks. Sigh. I had every intention of going to the catering tasting yesterday.  But about an hour before I was supposed to go I decided that it was just not a good idea at this current point in my weight-loss journey.  I called Bernadette and let her know that I wouldn't be able to make it.  So yes, I ran and hid.  I just don't think I am quite ready to deviate from my strict diet just yet.  I mean, I've lost eight sticks of butter, but even a 1 pound retreat would be like eating the 4 sticks of butter again.  Not ready for that.  It will come with time.  

As far as today goes, I am cleaning the house and relaxing.  The sky is supposed to unleash a torrent of rain any minute now. Believe it or not, weather.com says that there is a 100% chance of rain at 1:00, 2:00, 3:00, and 4:00 this afternoon.  That's a pretty ballsy prediction; time will tell if they end up being right. I had hoped to go running today because yesterday was a wash, but that will have to wait until tomorrow because I am not going to ruin Lucy and Ricky by running through mud.   Today's plan: strength training at the apartment during the thunderstorm.

Looking forward: no diet challenges in the foreseeable future. Just keep plugging away. Next Saturday I am getting my wedding hair trial done.  I've decided that if I manage to hit the 5 pound weight loss mark by then I might have to treat myself to a pedicure.

73 Days to the Gown: Willpower

For starters, let me just say, a picture is worth a thousand words:

That's right! 136.4!  Even I was surprised to see this much movement two days in a row.  This means in the grand scheme of things I've lost 1.6 pounds in 2 days.  Not too shabby.  

Other pertinent stats:

Calories consumed: 1000 (a little low, I realize).

Minutes of Exercise:  115 (65 walking 2.0 mph; 30 walking 4.0 mph; and 20 walking 3.0 mph) 

Weight change since yesterday (-0.8) 

According to myfitnesspal, if everyday were like yesterday, I'd by 125 pounds in 5 weeks.  I am realistic though; I doubt that I will have time to do nearly 2 hours of exercise every single day.  But hopefully I can pack more punch into shorter workouts as C25K gets more intense.  

Another thousand words: 

Ta Da!!  Allow me to introduce my new kicks.  I shall call them Lucy and Ricky (left and right respectively). They are so extremely comfortable; I spent all day yesterday breaking them in.  I am sure that they will make all the difference in the jogging portions of C25K. 

And boy oh boy were they expensive.  Luckily my father offered to pay for them if I reach my goal weight by the deadline.  That sounds like a valid contractual offer to me, and I accept, Father.  I accept. 

Well that takes care of the basic housekeeping matters.  Now I would like to take a moment to discuss willpower. 

I am aware that I can have all the fancy iPhone apps, shoes, earphones (well, I still have to get those), and other gear that money can buy, but it all means diddly-squat unless I can summon the willpower to actually get moving and stop eating.

I've got to admit, even I was a little surprised by how little willpower it took to spend 6 hours at the parade route with nary a beer or a snack.  I managed to get by very easily.  It was kind of tough explaining my new lifestyle to the seemingly shocked crowd, but it's the only way to make the hard work I do during the week worth it.   

When I felt temptation creep up, I kept reminding myself of how much weight I would have lost since the proposal if I hadn't allowed myself to "splurge" on the weekends as a reward for hard work during the week.  It's actually infuriating looking back; why work so hard only to have it mean nothing in the end because of the bad diet choices I made on the weekends? 

Not this time.  

One last thing I'd like to address is this damn tasting that I am scheduled to attend today.   I have been trying to come up with a plan of attack, but I have to admit that this is extremely challenging.  It's a tasting.  The point is to taste a bunch of, by definition, rich party foods.  I can't simply bring my Lean Cuisine to avoid the food and call it a day.  

I wish I could call upon my willpower; that would be easy.  I would simply not go to the tasting.  But after harassing Bernadette for weeks to get on the RSVP list that might be considered bad form. 

So here is the plan: I've decided to arrive and scan all the foods being offered.  I will not try anything that has been served at other tastings or anything that has an obvious flavor (I am well aware what cheddar cheese tastes like, for example).  I will only try the things they serve that I have not had a chance to try and that I would seriously consider putting on the wedding menu.  I will have a tiny taste, fill up on Diet Cokes, and run away as soon as possible. 

The moral of this plan?  Sometimes when willpower can't do the job, or the food is unavoidable, it's best to run and hide.